By the time I hit puberty, my life-force became completely untamed. No longer willing to repress it, I chose the path of rebellion, diving into budding friendships, late nights, partying, and a desire for sex, love, and acceptance. Without guidance on how to channel this growing energy into something empowering, I made destructive decisions that only fed my insecurities, creating a feedback loop between unsavory behaviors and an ever-worsening sense of self-esteem. Before long, I became a party girl, a high school dropout, and surrounded myself with a crowd who mirrored my own struggles.
In the years that followed, I put myself in countless dangerous situations. Some of these I survived unscathed, while others left deep scars. I’ve experienced physical, emotional, and sexual abuse, and I’ve inflicted harm on others. I’ve cheated and been cheated on, struggled with substance abuse, and even faced a couple of days where I wasn’t sure where my next meal would come from. I was wild—so wild that there were times that I couldn’t contain my own energy, leading to outbursts where I’d scream, wail, or self-medicate to dispel it. Looking back now, I understand that all of this stemmed from a lack of knowledge on how to work with my wild self intersecting with the patriarchal abuse of our time.
My healing journey began when I discovered classical yoga at the age of 25, learning to understand my energy through asana practice, 5 elements theory, and Ayurveda. I realized that I wasn’t a “bad” kid, but rather a very alive young woman who needed to learn how to surf her energy instead of being overwhelmed by it. This marked the beginning of feeling empowered by my own being.
It was a long journey, oscillating between a budding self-understanding and the wild nights where my uninhibited behaviors became a hidden part of my identity, as I assumed the roles of yoga teacher and psychotherapist. But gradually, my unhealthy habits receded, and I found self-acceptance and made peace with all parts of myself, which allowed the more virtuous aspects of my personality to emerge, especially those that enjoyed supporting others.
When I became a mother, I thought I had finally “made it.” Years had passed since my more destructive behaviors and I was directing all of my efforts towards my new family. But really, I was just shutting down my energy once again—not in the first couple of years of my son’s life, which were filled with the magic of new motherhood, but soon after, when I felt the weight of being a role model and someone worthy of having a child (a role I felt like an imposter in for many years). After leaving my son’s father and facing more of the responsibilities on my own, I threw everything into my work and professional identity. I became a good mother and a good therapist—but inside, I felt dead.
My body became overweight and sedentary, and my energy was repressed from denying my true desires. I felt cold, depressed, overwhelmed, and completely disconnected from myself.
When COVID hit, I prayed for change, and through a series of fortunate events, I moved to Costa Rica. There, I unintentionally remained celibate, but living in such a vibrant and fertile place reawakened my sexual energy independent of any relationship. After several healing years in the jungle, I moved to Florida, where I leveled up my body practices (through diet and exercise) and began re-exploring sexuality and relationships, finally integrating all parts of myself with wisdom and compassion.
Now I feel truly alive and free to wield my energy with creativity, passion, and intelligence. While I still make mistakes as I continue to grow, I’m able to course-correct quickly and effectively, confident that I will always find my way back home to myself. I’m deeply engaged with my body, mind, energy, and heart, and I’ve learned to use them as powerful tools for a healthy and fulfilling life. My baseline is power, clarity, and love for myself and others.
I’ve been incredibly fortunate to encounter teachers, teachings, and practices that have helped me piece together an understanding of the healthy wild woman in all her majesty, and I’m beyond honored to share my knowledge and support with so many inspiring women. This life could have gone in a very different direction for me, but with true effort and determination it has turned out to become spectacularly passionate, natural, loving, and wild.